Yuletide 2 - Battle 1

[cascadingfailure]

[ Once you enter the Escape Room, a series of messages pops up on your phones: ]

TOTAL⚓DISASTER: Wellll it looks like Naffy's out of commission? It'll take her awhile to reboot with how hard she just got hit by the autocensor!
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: Whatever you did, it really made her mad! Haha!
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: Anyway since I know what's going on now, I'm happy to help! It looks like the nature of the threat is a gang war between an evil thought sealed and another that you all and your fans helped to return to the world of the not-so-living? Wild!
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: In case you didn't get the memo, this means you're going to explore the combination WcDonald's and Damned Queen's Cookies!
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: There you'll find something you're looking for, probably…? But mostly you're looking for a way to contain the outbreaks!
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: And fortunately, we've received a message from a friendly entity known only as "The Borger King", who apparently has a stake in the downfall of Lonard's lost empire…
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: It says:
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: There is a war going on for your mind. Steal their secrets. Create the Ultimate Prankburger. The king awaits. Salvation will come.
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: Wow! It looks like it's time for corporate espionage, or something?
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: Anyway, you get to keep everything you find, unless it's a dolphin! That's mine.
TOTAL⚓DISASTER: Better get going! Charge!!!!!

[ And then everything goes white... ]

Comments

[heavenlyvisitor]

[ SIGHS! ]

I'll open them, you leave. We'll have a worse time if you're mauled beyond repair.

[bondsofsuffering]

...Alright. But tag me in if you get hurt, okay? I can at least, like - heal, numb, whatever.

[heavenlyvisitor]

Yeah-- Fine.

[ he heads to one of the boxes! ]

[idolpro]

Congratuation! Get equipped with:

Giftbox (Wrapped)

This is a giftbox (wrapped).

[heavenlyvisitor]

[ he opens the gift box.

6 ]

[idolpro]

Congratuation! Get equipped with:

Gift Box (Unwrapped)

Wow! An open box!

drugs...

Some sort of injectable liquid, complete with a complementary syringe! Who knows what it'll do to you. Dare you even make the attempt?

MiniMASAMUNE

A replica of a replica of a replica. Fits in the palm of one's hand.

[heavenlyvisitor]

...Is that all that's in every box...?

[bondsofsuffering]

[Knocking on the feezer door, you still good in there Tenn]

[heavenlyvisitor]

[ opens the door! ]

It was the same thing as last time-- But, without the injuries.

[bondsofsuffering]

...Seriously?!

[COUGH COUGH COUGH into his sleeve gomen]

[heavenlyvisitor]

...

Do you think we need to take the drugs.

[bondsofsuffering]

...

Before we take the drugs, let me try to get some of this ice melted. It might be a quest item, or it might be a waste of time, but I'm running out of ideas that don't sound super unpleasant.

[heavenlyvisitor]

With what? We have no flame source for the lamp oil.

[bondsofsuffering]

It doesn't need to be lit, it just can't burn long.

[...

Actually, are those barrels with black goop still in here?]

[idolpro]

Looks like there is, yep.

[bondsofsuffering]

[Does the black goop smell like anything in particular?]

[idolpro]

It smells like cookies and oil.

[heavenlyvisitor]

...Do we burn this?

[bondsofsuffering]

The other team might need it, so I'm going to check with them before I burn anything.

[He's been furiously texting over here and shivering don't mind him.]

[bondsofsuffering]

[Nemesis sent him a cup from WcDonald's so he's just going to dip that into the cookie... oil? Sauce???

Does this also explode in his face somehow.]

[idolpro]

Congratuations! Get equipped with:

Barrel of Cookie Sauce

Oh no...

[heavenlyvisitor]

[ what do you mean oh no ]

[bondsofsuffering]

[TAKING THIS BARREL AND YEETING IT THROUGH THE DROP BOX.]

[bondsofsuffering]

[...

Can he send the wholeass barrel through the drop box?]

[bondsofsuffering]

[Exiting to wait in the lobby and fret!!]